This Is What Happens in Couples Therapy

Unhappy couple in therapy

Around 50 percent of marriages end in divorce.

There are many reasons marriages can end in divorce, if it’s infidelity, disagreement, or something else. Outside of marriage, couples will also break up for various reasons if they are career-related. Both people in the marriage or relationship have changed over the past couple of months or years.

This is why it’s important for people who are dating or married couples to consider couple’s therapy. Yet, you might have a lot of couples therapy questions before you consider going.

You might wonder if couples therapy questions actually work or if it’s designed for specific people. You might also have couples sex therapy questions you’re not sure about asking.

You might also be wondering what the best questions to ask in therapy are.
There’s a lot to wonder when it comes to couples therapy and if it actually works. This article shows puts all that to rest by showing how effective it is and why every couple should consider couple’s therapy regardless if they are going through a rough patch.

Here’s a guide on what happens in couples therapy.

The Introduction 

The first part of your couples therapy session will be an introduction. You and your significant other will meet the counselor together, not individually.

There’s no pressure or even an expectation to hash out any disagreements between you and your partner. Instead, the introductory meeting is about letting the counselor understand how you met as a couple.

You want to provide background and history, so the counselor understands everything about your relationship. This also helps the counselor understand both perspectives when both you and your partner provide an accurate and detailed account of how you met.

Toward the end of the first session, your counselor should give you an idea of what to look forward to. You’ll have an idea of what to expect in future sessions.

Discussion of Problems

After the introductory session, you will then discuss the challenges you have as a couple and what specific problem you are facing at the moment.
The counselor will hear accounts from both sides instead of having only one perspective.

In addition, you will also discuss the history of what problems you have had or have had with specific issues. It’s important to remember that during this session, it’s about focusing on a problem or what another person has done, but rather an awareness of the problem for your counselor to understand.

Your couples therapy counselor may ask for you to be open. They may ask you to be open-minded while the other person gives their opinion of the disagreement you are having in the relationship.

The discussion of the problems session may be the most challenging session because you will need to listen to your partner. You will need to be open and give your opinion of the relationship.

It’s important to remember that you and your partner are attending a session so it can be worked out. While it may make you uncomfortable with what your partner has to say, it’s always about the end goal of working it out.

What Are Your Goals? 

After you discuss conflict and what problems you are having as a couple, your counselor will guide you on the goals you need to set as a couple.
In fact, you and your partner will come up with goals that you want to have that will help you overcome your problems. The counselor will guide you initially, but it’s ultimately up to you and your partner to come up with goals that align.

If you and your partner have goals that don’t align, it’s best to figure out how to support the other person without giving up on the relationship.
When you attend couples therapy with your partner, it will be about the other person and focusing on their goals while working together.

Find a Balance

The ultimate goal is to find a balance that works for you and your partner. At the end of the session, you want your counselor and partner to understand your feelings.

You want to make sure that you are understood when it comes to your problems and frustrations in the relationship. The couples therapy session isn’t about getting your way or having the counselor point out your faults.

It’s about finding a balance that works for you and your partner.

It’s about figuring out how to help each other grow in the relationship.

You’ll ultimately discover that couples therapy is about being vulnerable. You are showing what bothers you and what bothers your partner. The counselor is there to guide you and ask questions that open up your relationship.

It will show that not every relationship is perfect, but that doesn’t mean it has to end. Taking a step toward couples therapy shows that you are both committed to finding a balance.

Now Your Couples Therapy Questions Are Answered

Deciding to go to couples therapy can be intimidating because you don’t know what to expect. You may think it’s about the counselor telling you that you need to change or about the counselor taking sides.

However, it’s not about any of that. The sessions will be about learning and listening to your partner, figuring out a solution, and finding goals together. When you take steps to see a counselor, even if you are a bit intimidated by the couples therapy questions, it shows you and your partner’s willingness to stay together.

If you have more questions about couples therapy, you can contact us here.